NRA School Shooting Prevention Back to School Specials
1: “Little Kitty Kevlar” Backpack. Providing both great carrying capacity and triple layered kevlar protection system, your little angel can hold this up the next time a psychotic maniac with a semi-automatic weapon and 500 rounds of ammo shows up. Comes in pink and purple.
2: “Little Toy Soldier” Armored Hat: Yes, your little man can stay warm, be fashionable and not have his head blown off with this NRA “Top TBI Prevention Fashion Accessory of the Year”.
3: “My Big Girl Is Growing Up” Armored Training Bra and Panties. Protect those all important private places from injury. In Multiple colors and patterns including urban camouflage.
4: “I'm Invisible” Crowd Camouflage Schoolwear. Don't just protect your baby with body armor, but allow them to disappear into the crowd of victims with this computer generated pattern camouflage. They'll simply 'disappear” into the fleeing crowd or pile of squirming, wounded bodies.
5: “Wayne Lapierre Talking Teddy”. Yes, nothing will soothe your child's fears during a mass shooting like that voice of the 2nd Amendment. His recorded voice will calm the fears and emotional over-reactions like no one else: “Remember, that gun isn't shooting you, that maniac I allowed to have the gun did. Too bad he doesn't just have a small knife rather than a 30 round clip. God Bless America”.
1: “Little Kitty Kevlar” Backpack. Providing both great carrying capacity and triple layered kevlar protection system, your little angel can hold this up the next time a psychotic maniac with a semi-automatic weapon and 500 rounds of ammo shows up. Comes in pink and purple.
2: “Little Toy Soldier” Armored Hat: Yes, your little man can stay warm, be fashionable and not have his head blown off with this NRA “Top TBI Prevention Fashion Accessory of the Year”.
3: “My Big Girl Is Growing Up” Armored Training Bra and Panties. Protect those all important private places from injury. In Multiple colors and patterns including urban camouflage.
4: “I'm Invisible” Crowd Camouflage Schoolwear. Don't just protect your baby with body armor, but allow them to disappear into the crowd of victims with this computer generated pattern camouflage. They'll simply 'disappear” into the fleeing crowd or pile of squirming, wounded bodies.
5: “Wayne Lapierre Talking Teddy”. Yes, nothing will soothe your child's fears during a mass shooting like that voice of the 2nd Amendment. His recorded voice will calm the fears and emotional over-reactions like no one else: “Remember, that gun isn't shooting you, that maniac I allowed to have the gun did. Too bad he doesn't just have a small knife rather than a 30 round clip. God Bless America”.
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